How to feel Chosen, not set apart.

Have you ever felt like you’ve been set apart? I know I have. When I was a little girl, I loved playing with three other best friends outside and we would laugh and make up games that would keep us busy all day. There was one day specifically I remember that they stopped talking to me. I looked out my window and could see them at the park playing and running around together, it made me a little jealous.

At the moment, my mother was not allowing me to go outside because we were on our way somewhere and she was afraid I would get dirty. So, as I sat there imagining what they were talking about, I started to cry. A few moments later I could hear them running past my apartment window so I went over and raised it just enough to yell out. “Hey girls, over here!” They looked up at me and kept running not even so much as a nod in my direction. My feelings were hurt and I slammed the window. Why would they ignore me I thought to myself. Just a few days ago we were all holding hands skipping here and there.

Well, when I was able to see them face to face they told me that they just didn’t want to play with me anymore. I wanted to know if it was something I had done or said. At the age of 9, I really wasn’t sure how to handle a disagreement, right. I mean, its not like I was an expert at relationships at this age. So, I was frustrated and angry as I turned around and went home. My mother could tell something was wrong but I never really spoke to her about it. I was more of a child who kept things to myself and would rather deal wit it on my own, whatever that meant.

There are many other instances as a child I was treated this way by my so called friends and others. I’ve tried not to let it hurt me but at the same time, lets be honest, it hurts. Okay, who’s still with me here. Have any of you ever dealt with feeling left out?

As an adult, situations like this are still hurtful. I find myself questioning similar scenarios such as, “why didn’t I get an invitation to that party? Why didn’t my kids get invited to that get together with the neighborhood kids? There was an after work get together to celebrate a birthday, but I wasn’t aware.”

If you are honest, I bet there have been a few of these occasions in your life as well. Its okay, were all human and its just natural to want to get invited to everything. Even if we can’t attend, its just the mere fact that we were thought of.

How about you? You’ve been told to work extra hours even though it doesn’t fit your schedule. Given notice that you were going to be laid off with a few other employees even though you’ve been there for awhile. How about that doctor visit and being informed that you can’t have children when there’s nothing you and your husband want more. How about feeling as though what you do for a living has no impact in this life, and you feel so small by “just” being a stay at home mother. How about “just” leading a bible study when you feel qualified to speak on a big stage. Writing a blog when y0u feel you should have a #1 best selling book on the shelf at the local bookstore. There are many times we feel diminished that we are doing small(er) work for the kingdom instead of where we feel we should be.

Chosen not set apart.

God rewards a faithful heart. He is capable of taking you places you can’t even dream of. He can do amazing things with your health, your career, your marriage, your addictions, your relationships. For example, that “just” a stay at home mother has been equipped to lead those small children. Those many hours spent reading to them may spark a book lover and possible writer, who may write a book that thousands of others will read and therefore impact lives. They may grow up to be a teacher who spends endless hours teaching children that they are special and one day end up getting a Best teacher of the year award. When one of these children returns and tells them, “you were the only one who believed in me.” And the domino affect just keeps going. You never know what the full impact of your decisions can have and the trajectory of your life and others, it can totally change when you decide to follow the plans God has for your life.

Chosen not set apart. 

I am a work from home mother and have been chosen by God to have an inspirational heart that motivates others and is gentle, loving, and compassionate. I try to instill this in my children so they see these in me and follow my lead. When they see someone hurting, homeless, or less-than they will have compassion to give, lead, pray, and inspire. Not just walk by, walk away, or say too bad for you.

I want to encourage you to change your mindset and start thinking what is the assignment God has for me(you). You have been Chosen. How can I be obedient toward giving him glory in everything that I do. How can I look at situations as being Chosen instead of set apart. Do this for one day. Tomorrow, when something happens to you that you may feel is unfair, STOP.  Tell yourself I have not been set apart, I have been Chosen and see if that doesn’t do something to your emotions. Say it out loud. Repeat it.

I’m with ya on this one. I have my days where I totally feel set apart. Lets do this together!!

God used many ordinary people from the Bible and sets them up to be set apart. He will do that for you and I as well.

Romans 12:2

Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect. 

I’m rooting for you sister,



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